Spring 1901 - Results

There are no retreats this round.  Fall 1901 moves are due by midnight next Friday.  DON'T submit your next set of moves to me: Tom is currently setting up an email address dedicated to diplomacy moves, so stay tuned for that.

MOVES:

AUSTRIA-HUNGARY

Vienna -> Galicia (bounce)

Budapest -> Serbia

Trieste -> Albania

ENGLAND

Edinburgh -> North Sea

Liverpool -> York

London -> English Channel

FRANCE

Marseilles -> Spain

Brest -> Picardy

Paris -> Burgandy (bounce)

GERMANY

Kiel -> Holland

Berlin -> Kiel

Munich -> Burgandy (bounce)

ITALY

Venice -> Piedmont

Rome -> Apulia

Naples -> Ionian Sea

RUSSIA

St. Petersburg -> Gulf of Bothnia

Warsaw -> Galicia (bounce)

Moscow -> Ukraine

Sevastopol -> Black Sea (bounce)

TURKEY

Constantinople -> Bulgaria

Smyrna -> Constantinople

Ankara -> Black Sea (bounce)

Below is an exported image from my adjudicator software.  It's a graphical representation of everyone's moves.  I'll be including this image below the written orders throughout the game.  Enjoy:

France is Open for Awesome

Bonjour! I'm sorry for not responding to the various diplomatic envoys you've sent. My own emissaries have been enjoying some of the mandatory eight weeks of vacation we French take annually. However, my secretary Madeline has returned from holiday on the French Riveria (with a hot tan) and forwarded me all of your queries.



I want to assure you all I will now be available for communiques and will be responding to your diplomatic overtures.

In unrelated news, I'll actually be on vacation for a week starting Saturday, so I move to move next week's deadline. I feel I am doing an excellent job representing the French work ethic.

The Sun Sets Regularly on the Italian Empire....

A Lesson in History from one of the world's foremost historians*

Early History: Ah the greatness of Rome, many classicists have pondered this over a pint of 15$ beer and a bad translation of the Odessey. Rome in it's heyday was a pinnacle of civilization, philosophy, engineering, and brutal, brutal corporal punishment. While I don't intend on duplicating the example made of spartacus's followers along the Appian way...it is inspiring to watch that on your way to a skii vacation in the Alps. Of course, Rome would have continued had it not been for killing jesus as well as a few other problems**

The Middle Ages: Following the "mission accomplished banner" placed above Rome following the 8th sacking of the city by visigoths, a new age of peace and prosperity had begun! we call this period the dark ages. (primarily because of increasingly high cloud cover caused by the burning of bodies during the plague, crusades against jews, frequent wars between city states and the crusades.) Italy during this period was a picture of model management, where new ideas (sanctioned by the Papacy only for fear of death) were greated with eager wonder and curiosity (curiosity subject to approval from the papacy)

Age of Imperialism: Italy decided to watch how things were DONE FIRST before jumping into something unprepared...and despite being beaten once....badly...by the Ethiopians, we got our revenge with Hitler's help. And we all know that turned out for the best in the end.

Modern Day: Aside from being associated with corruption and soccer matches so violent fans are no longer allowed to participate in them, Italy has remained the premier power in the Medditeranean between Marsaiiles and Yugoslavia which is north of Malta. An enviable position to be sure.

now that you know my rich and storied history, quake in fear as we do what Italy has done in the past. Sit on the bottom of the pond like a lost boot waiting for some fishermen to catch him and utter a sigh of bitter dissapointment.

*This is a complete lie and fabrications

** among these problems are: spiraling inflation and a collapsing trading system whose labor system was in dissarray following the overdependance on slaves imported from conquest, a decadent and immoral leadership caste which proceeded to further Rome's problems through mismanagement and a wholesale avoidance of the problems facing her government, Autocratic leaders and a lack of representation for the majority in government, encroachments by barbarians, for whom climate change had necessitated them moving south into Roman territory, a disintigrating and increasingly outnumbered military establishment, the spliting of the EMpire into two halves, The rise of superior steppe calvary, and wholesale arrogance of Roman military and policital leaders in the face of a rapidly changing social and global heirarchy.

Don't mess with Russia

That's right "Ahhhhhh Motherland". I have just let you all in on the Russian strategy, protect the motherland at all costs. Fear of messing with Russia shall be my ally. After all we are a government that will spend all of our time, resources and money on the military and continue to oppress the poor, poor people of the country until once again Russia is the world power we desperately need her to be.

Quake in Fear, Mortals!

My scientists have been working around the clock to create a new weapon, capable of removing the souls from my enemies and turning them into priceless diamonds, which will fuel our war effort.

Here is an artists rendering of what a victory by Turkey might look like. Note my fantastic moustache and ponder: how can someone have such an awesome full beard and a handlebar moustache?!

In Germany We Trust

Greetings Friends,

Its great when things work out. I was afraid Bill and I were going to have to watch this game from the sidelines. But as fate would have it, we become neighbors once again. And let me reassure all of you, Germany is very good to the neighbors. We treat everyone with dignity and respect. An invasion by the Germans should not be viewed as hostile, we are only trying to spread our superior culture. It should be an honor and a privilege to welcome us into your capitals. Your citizens already thirst for our beers and hungry for our sausages. So keep your boarders to Germany open, its the best thing you can do.

A Snapshot from Owen's Summer Vacation

"Oh, snap!"

You're all lucky

I would just like to inform the powers (or lack thereof) that be, that you should all consider yourselves lucky I will be in the woods this summer, and therefore incommunicado. As all who played last round know now, the feigned stupidity of yours truly can only lead to back-stabs, and improbable come-from-behind silver meddles (sic.) You will all miss my elaborate Imperial Harem receptions, and the gradual incursion of my pointy-arched architecture that reached the largely boring European heartland of Austria and even Italy last round. Good luck to you all, may the dirtiest man win, and above all else, finish what I started and Kill Craig. We'll see how you all enjoy the round without a Turkish Delight.

I now bid you happy hunting, and will be available for counseling from my mansion in Crete where I will be serving time for crimes against humanity, and general buffoonery.

Until the next time Europe finds itself on the brink of war,
this is Turkish Delight, signing off.

P.S. To my inexperienced Turkish successor, for last rounds second place finish, I blame the Armenians. Might I suggest this time around, you attempt a genocide that will be denied for centuries to come. It'll certainly provide good target practice for your Janissaries.

An open letter to the European community/theatre of war:

Due to the untimely, crumpet-and-scone related demise of our brilliant military strategist, William "Nelson" Gerrard, and all my immediate superiors, including the incomparable Admiral Snodgrass and the peerless Peer Pickard-Cambridge, I do hereby assume full command of the forces of Great Britain. I take it with the fulsome, self-important sense of solemnity duly occasioned by the passing of so many talented leaders whose deaths so helpfully paved the way for my own rise to power. As the new commander of the forces of England, I wish all to know that I am not ill disposed to any. Yet. Any legates, nuncios, Botschaftere, or turban-clad emissaries will be graciously entertained at my palatial country estate in Thwapshire and their overtures will be considered. If they would be so kind as to arrive not after high tea, they will not be disappointed of the highest standards of English hospitality: I serve devilishly good crumpets and scones.

You wouldn't hit a guy with glasses, would you?

It may seem fitting to some of the veterans of last game that I drew Austria-Hungary, the easiest country on the map to bone royally. If this is because they believe that the winner of the previous game, regardless of who it turned out to be, should in all fairness be given a handicap in the next, then so be it. If, however, they believe that I was a singularly treacherous player in the last game and, for this reason, deserve to be squashed forthwith at the outset of the new game, let me get ahead of this scurrilous accusation and assure the new players and potential allies that I was nothing of the sort, and deserve no such thing. I am an excellent ally, capable of long-term loyalty and strategic assistance. Consult, if you like, my alliance with Russia until 1904, and the promises I kept to Germany, year after year after year. Know that I consider everyone's slate clean, even my erstwhile bitterest enemies', and ask only that the same courtesy be extended to me. But to those whose strategic imagination has been destroyed by spite, who look at the new map and see nothing but my bloated corpse floating in the Adriatic: Bring it on, I say.

1901 - Starting Positions

STARTING POSITIONS:

AUSTRIA-HUNGARY (Bill)

A-Budapest

A-Vienna

F-Trieste

ENGLAND (Leo)

A-Liverpool

F-Edinburgh

F-London

FRANCE (Craig)

A-Marseilles

A-Paris

F-Brest

GERMANY (Tony)

A-Berlin

A-Munich

F-Kiel

ITALY (Tom)

A-Rome

A-Venice

F-Naples

RUSSIA (Damian)

A-Moscow

A-Warsaw

F-Sevastopol

F-St. Petersburg SC

TURKEY (Matt)

A-Constantinople

A-Smyrna

F-Ankara

The Stage is Set...

With a few drop outs, bail outs, and bow outs, we have a set stage....

The following are the players and assignments:

Leo Landrey - England - LLandrey@gmail.com

Craig Rubens - France - CRubens@gmail.com

Tom Mullane - Italy - TMullane@superteacher.us or TMullane@brewsterschools.org

(First one preferred, they screen my mail)

Bill Gerrard - Austria-Hungary - William.Gerrard@gmail.com

Matt Barnard - Turkey - MatthewJBarnard@gmail.com

Tony Martin - Germany - HStony13@hotmail.com

Damian Moran - Russia - Gillbergdm@aol.com

Moves will not be due until June 27th (next Friday) - Bill will be adjudicating this game as well, seeing as he has a program to do so and he did such a good job last time. Please send all completed moves to him. We are in the process of creating a seperate email address to send the moves to, so stay tuned for that.

CONFIDENTIAL - GERMANY 1901 - Spring

If you decide to change it before the deadline you can submit it as:

REVISIONS - CONFIDENTIAL - GERMANY 1901 - Spring

NO moves may be changed or altered after the deadline, this includes during the grace period. You can only change moves up to midnight Friday night.

Other Rules to be aware of:

1. If you fail to submit by Friday at 12 midnight, you will have until Saturday at midnight to submit. After that we're taking your balls (you will be declared in civil disorder and all units will hold).

2. Builds or winter adjustments are due to be submitted by midnight Sunday or they are forfeited (or we will choose which units to destroy).

3. If there are extenuating circumstances, we are not heartless, but drop us a line to let us know.

4. Lying is permitted and encouraged.

5. Bill must not win this game. Seriously.

That is the scariest photograph I've ever seen, ever.

Seriously, that is the kind of photo that pops up in a horror film, and when the main character looks closer he sees a little boy in a sailor suit peering out the attic window and gee he looks just like the boy who used to live there but he was drowned by his mother 30 years ago so it couldn't be him in the attic it just couldn't be that's impossible and HOLY SHIT DID THAT PUMPKIN MAN'S HEAD JUST MOVE???

Also, it probably doesn't help that Mr. Mullane looks like he just escaped from 40 years of solitary confinement in a mental asylum and is imagining what the photographer's head would look like in a blender.

Above:  An image that is not nearly as disturbing as the picture of Tom and his father at the pumpkin village.

P.S.  If anyone is willing to join a second board featuring old rivals Tony Martin and Bill Gerrard, let Tom know so we can set it up.

By the way, even though I'm not in the new draw, Matt and Leo shouldn't feel that they've been spared a humiliating photoshop experience.  I'll be watching ...

The New Players Are.....

(above, my dad and I in a pumpkin village. Yes, it is as creepy as it sounds)

I put the following players into a bingo globe and the names came out in this order:

1. Craig

2. Tucker

3. Owen

4. Tom

5. Damian

6. Matt

7. Leo

Alternates: Tony, Bill

The following nations were then drawn at random from a hat.

Craig = France

Tucker = Germany

Owen = Austria

Tom = Italy

Damian = Russia

Matt = Turkey

Leo = England

If anyone above drops out or voluntarily gives up their spot, please let me know by Friday this week when it will be made official. I also need to give the newbies some time to register and get a first post in before any moves are made or discussions begin.

I need all email addresses sent to me so I can post them:

TMullane@superteacher.us

P.S. for a small bribe or perhaps no bribe, I might be willing to surrender my horrible draw to either Bill or Tony, please let me know if either of you are interested.

Something's Afoot...

After a careful discussion with myself and a few trusted advisors, I have been a little hasty in my decision on what process will be used to determine our new player.

I propose the following, which people should feel free to discuss in this forum. Since we have a few spots and many players, I think the most fair thing we can do is to draw names out of a hat (all of our names) and the one or two that are not picked will sit this round out and be guaranteed a spot in the next game that starts.

TO all those that think it is a good idea, please post, negative or affirmative. Your silence will be interpreted as consent to this proposal. I think this is fair, and would like to have countries assigned for spring of 1901 by Friday next week. So the deadline for discussion is Sunday Night this weekend!

-TOm

Oh yeah, well...

I won the popular vote, and I would have won the game if you'd only seated the Michigan and Florida delegates. So, in essence, I am the real winner.

I'd Like To Thank Everyone Who Lost

I couldn't have won without your losing.

Results Fall 1914 - Game over man, game over!

England has captured 18 supply centers.  The game is over.  However, this round's results require some explanation.  Owen is no doubt scratching his head right now, wondering how he got pushed out of the Ionian Sea, given that he supported that unit's hold with two other units.  I'll quote two complementary rules from the official Diplomacy rule book: 1.  "A unit not ordered to move can be supported by a support order that mentions only its province."  2.  "A unit ordered to move [Ionian Sea] can be supported by a support order that matches the move the unit is trying to make."  In other words, a unit in motion cannot be supported by a "support hold" order, even if that unit bounces back to its original position.  Ionian Sea was a unit in motion, thus its hold could not be supported.  I seem to remember someone making this mistake before, but since it didn't affect the outcome in that instance, I didn't take the opportunity to clarify the rules at the time.  My apologies.

MOVES:

AUSTRIA

Civil Disorder, all units hold and await the arrival of their new benevolent rulers

ENGLAND

Moscow Holds

St. Petersburg S Moscow

Barents Sea S St. Petersburg

North Sea -> Norwegian Sea

Kiel -> Baltic Sea

Holland -> Kiel

Berlin -> Prussia

Munich Holds

English Channel -> North Sea

Spain -> Portugal

Gascony -> Spain

Marseilles S Gascony -> Spain

MAO C Portugal -> North Africa

ITALY

Portugal -> North Africa

Galicia -> Vienna (bounce)

Bohemia S Galicia -> Vienna

Naples Holds

Rome S Naples (support cut)

Western Med. -> Tunis

Albania -> Ionian

Tyrrhenian Sea S Albania -> Ionian

TURKEY

Venice -> Rome (bounce)

Apulia S Venice -> Rome (illegal move, Apulia does not share a coastline with Rome)

Ionian Sea -> Naples

Greece -> Albania

Aegean Sea S Ionian Sea

Eastern Med. S Ionian Sea

Trieste -> Venice (bounce)

Serbia -> Trieste (bounce)

Bulgaria -> Romania

Sevastopol S Bulgaria -> Romania

Budapest S Vienna

Vienna Holds

THE FINAL TALLY:

AUSTRIA controls the following supply centers: Warsaw (1 total).

ENGLAND controls the following supply centers: Liverpool, London, Edinburgh, Holland, Belgium, Denmark, Kiel, Sweden, St. Petersburg, Brest, Berlin, Norway, Paris, Moscow, Munich, Marseilles, Spain, Portugal (18 total).

ITALY controls the following supply centers: Rome, Naples, Tunis (3 total).

TURKEY controls the following supply centers: Constantinople, Ankara, Smyrna, Bulgaria, Romania, Sevastopol, Serbia, Budapest, Vienna, Greece, Moscow, Trieste (12 total).

An intercepted Letter

The following letter was delivered to Warsaw from Spain earlier this year.

Dear Uncle Bob,

I don't know how much longer we can hold out here in Madrid. The English troops are led by a bloodthirsty beast know as El Gerrard. Our city will soon be burned to the ground. I am worried that I will starve to death before...(handwriting change) El Gerrard's handsome and fair troops calmly enter our city with a minimal amount of raping and pillaging of the local shops and apartment buildings. Oh what a wonderous man General Gerrard is. All hail El Gerrard and his glorious new regime.

sincerely, Little Girl

Retreats Spring 1914

ITALY retreats Venice -> Rome

TURKEY retreats Moscow -> Sevastopol

Fall 1914 moves are due midnight Friday.

Results Spring 1914

The Turkish Delight rejoined civilization and submitted his moves.  Retreats are due midnight Wednesday.  Fall 1914 moves are due midnight Friday.

MOVES:

AUSTRIA

Warsaw S St. Petersburg -> Moscow

ENGLAND

London -> Holland

North Sea C London -> Holland

St. Petersburg -> Moscow

Norway -> St. Petersburg

Barents Sea S Norway -> St. Petersburg

Baltic Sea -> Kiel

Tyrolia -> Munich

Berlin S Tyrolia -> Munich

English Channel Holds

Gascony -> Spain

MAO S Gascony -> Spain

Paris -> Gascony

Burgandy -> Marseilles

ITALY

Portugal -> Spain (bounce)

Gulf of Lyon -> Western Med.

Naples Holds

Tyrhennian Sea S Naples

Venice -> Trieste (unit dislodged, must retreat or disband)

Albania S Venice -> Trieste (support cut)

Munich -> Bohemia

Galicia -> Vienna (bounce)

TURKEY

Trieste -> Venice

Apulia S Trieste -> Venice

Ionian Sea -> Naples (bounce)

Smyrna -> Eastern Med.

Serbia -> Trieste

Vienna S Serbia -> Trieste (support cut)

Greece -> Albania (bounce)

Aegean Sea S Ionian Sea

Bulgaria -> Serbia

Romania -> Budapest

Constantinople -> Bulgaria

Moscow Holds (unit dislodged, must retreat or disband)

RETREATS:

ITALY must either retreat Venice to Tyrolia, Piedmont, Tuscany or Rome, or disband the unit.

TURKEY must either retreat Moscow to Livonia, Ukraine or Sevastopol, or disband the unit.

Winter Adjustments 1913

The winter adjustments are late this round because Owen was, by his own account, "in the woods all weekend."  One can only imagine what he was doing out there.  (Did it involve a pine cone?  I'm just asking.)  Everyone has sent in moves except for Owen, so if he doesn't submit by midnight Monday, civil disorder will be declared in Turkey and the Sultan's harem will be dismissed.  Them's the breaks.

AUSTRIA destroys A-Livonia.

ENGLAND builds A-London.

TURKEY builds A-Constantinople and F-Smyrna.