Happy Holidays

Final Results - Spring 1905

The abortion gone wrong that was the spring of 1905 has come to a close

France retreats from Beligum to Picardy

Russia retreats from Rumania to Ukraine

The Italian unit has been moved to where it is supposed to be. (apologies for the mistake)

This Map is the most current now available, happy hunting folks.

Since at least one person has voted to NOT continue to write moves during the break I am inclined to put things on hold until the New Year.

Merry Christmas folks, enjoy this holiday card.

A modest proposal

The last several posts have been entertaining. I know hatred and mistrust of me is widespread. But I am the austrians. and Frankly, there is a reason their country doesn't exist anymore. Hate on Haters.

A question: do we want to keep submitting moves through the break or do people have better things to do than waste their time posting on this blog. I am not insulted to submit my vote. I would enjoy continuing to waste my time. Please check out the new poll, something that is actually being used for a real purpose this time.

For your viewing pleasure: Every invasion of Russia to date has been a success, ask Napoleon, Hitler, the Mongols, the Turks and Rambo. My troops have been nice enough to send some photos from the front, I sent them a free barrell of scnapps for their trouble. I'm sure they won't even need winter uniforms.

Operation "Return To Sender"

It's fun to dream, isn't it?

Quick Clarification

While I'm sure this was an unintentional error on the Arch Duke's part, I'd like to fix a mistake on the board. One of my moves last turn was: Venice -> Piedmont. Tom listed this correctly in the moves below the map but has accidentally moved my army from Venice to Tyrolia.

In other news, for those who didn't bother to read all of the Czar's diatribe, here's a highlight:

"Sorry about the treachery."

Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

The Updated Map

The map has been updated*

*Disclaimer, this is the Russian Interpretation of the map. Please read the next post. All will become clear.

This game is never going to end!

Please stand by for a message from Russia's Supreme General, the always honorable Mike Tyson.

But first, I am going to make a statement. I'd like to share some exerts from my will, which will probably be read in the next few weeks. Or at least I hope so. I leave to my dear friends in the north, England, a steaming pile of dog shit, because you will gain nothing from me. To Germany, I leave the keys to the Russian Castle. I know that the only thing that would completely piss Tom off would be letting Larry back into the game when he was on the brink of extermination. To France, I leave you a promise that I will conduct a sit down between you and Italy so you could be at peace, and continue fighting your respective foes. To Italy, I'd like to give you some advice, you trusted Tom before, and see where it got you. Trust him now, and see where it gets you. Also, I'd like to discuss your relations with France. Oh, and one more thing, what the fuck are you doing with the fleet in the Aegean? What a waste of a unit. It might as well be an Austrian fleet. I'm putting up an updated map after I'm done with this, special for you Criag. To Turkey I leave Stevastopol and the Black Sea. Tom wants you dead. Now I want you alive. If anything, just to eat him up inside. Sorry about the treachery. And lastly, to the Archduke. What can I say that no one else has said to you? May Larry inherit the world. You'll get no more than Rumania. I'm going to let every other country into my boarders (besides England, they can eat shit), let them run through the Russian interior like cancer. Then, I'll laugh when Italy marches into Trieste this turn. that is all I'll share now.

All the unpleasantness aside, have a nice Christmas and New Years everyone.

And now, Iron Mike.

"I just want to conquer people and their souls."

Thanks Mike.

This game is never going to end

A Tribute to Tom Mullane: Arch-Traitor, Chief Strategist, Devourer of Children's Dreams, and the Wind Beneath My Wings

And a very Merry Christmas as well to Tony and Damian, my erstwhile allies. Keep 'em flying!

I hate you guys

This is how I feel right now.

A Declaration of Independance

For those still staring at the computer dumbstruck, here is an excerpt from the email I sent to Italy and England.

" Call to Arms,For too long, the nations of the west and east have oppressed the nations of the not so west and not so east. This must be halted at all costs. The Austrian Government proposes a Grand Allaince to stave off this impending threat to our national soverignity. I propose that the nations of Italy, Austria, and England enter into an elaborate plan of coordinated destruction upon our nefarious enemies the Russians and the French. Everyone in this game has been wronged. Some more then others. It is time to ignore the petty strife of our times and come together to fight for a common cause. Life, Liberty, Supply Centers and the destruction of Damian's inept nation. I also have no desire to see another Tony Martin Email that makes no sense. (you can trust me until you can't....and then I am untrustable, unless you have a better offer? which I will not listen to anyway. Please submit your offer. I will not not not read it.)

We the People of these united nations, outnumbered, besieged and alone have joined together in the spirit of fraternity and vengeance. We formally declare war on the Russian and French Empires.

We propose the following surrender terms to our adversaries:

- The withdrawl of all Russian units from Scadanavian supply centers to be occupied by the English and Germans

-The acceptance of English "Peacekeepers" in Brest and Paris

-Italian Colonial administration of the Iberian Penninsula as well as the internationalizing of the port of Marsailles (the following countries will be permitted: Italy.)

-An Austrian military government will rule the Kremlin (Moscow, Warsaw and Sevastapol

-All units will withdraw from Turkish Supply centers and issue a formal apology for a horrible photoshop job on Owen's picture.

REPARATIONS

-You will allow the Archduke to have one night with the Russian crown princess. A movie and popcorn followed by a light dinner. TO BE PAID FOR BY THE RUSSIAN GOVERNMENT.

-The French will Burn all artwork created during the post-impressionist period and allow hoboes to sleep in the Louvre.

An Interpretation of the results

In the north, English gains appear to coincide with a perfect encyclopedic knowledge of French and Russian moves. Germany has decided to go on a suicide mission with old men and hitler youth to attack the Russians in Moscow. Good luck guys, safe trip. Italy also seemed to move with an unbridled confidence, and all her predictions about French moves came true as well. Stunning. Austria and Italy demonstrate an enormous amount of trust and launch a combined arms attack on the Russians and the French.

The game has clearly taken a turn for the surreal. All 7 players remain more than 6 moves into the game, unheard of. It is a testament to your skill as beginning players, our total lack of trustworthyness and my unparalleled ability to be unconciousanably evil. What will the Fall bring, only time can tell. Feel free to vent your frustration and anger through all the necessary and public channels available.

Retreats are due by Sunday - I will place a new poll, to see if people want to continue submitting moves over the break or if we want to pause until after the new year. please give me feedback.

Results Spring 1905 - Retreats Needed

All units marked with others over them need to post retreats. Except for Ankara...which is retreated off the board.

Moves Listed Below:

Austria -

Budapest -> Rumania
Bulgaria S Budapest -> Rumania
Vienna -> Gallicia
Trieste -> Serbia
Tyrolia -> Bohemia

Turkey -

Constantinople -> Ankara
Smyrna S Constantinople -> Ankara

Italy -

TYR -> GOL
WMED S TYR -> GOL
Rome ->Tuscany
Venice -> Piedmont
Greece - AGN

Russia -

StPetersburg (nc) ->Norway (bounce)
Norway -> NS (bounce)
Sweden -> Skag (bounce cuts support)
Silesia ->Prussia (bounce)
Sevastapol ->Armenia
Rumania S Bulgaria (support cut)
BLK -> Constantinople
Ankara -> Smryna (bounce, unit dislodged and retreated off the board)

Germany -

Kiel -> Baltic Sea
Berlin -> Prussia (bounce)

France -
Marsailles ->Spain
GOL Holds (dislodged must retreat)
Paris -> Burgandy
Munich S Holland -> Kiel
Belgium -> Holland (bounce, unit dislodged and must retreat)
Brest -> MAO
ENG S Norway -> NS


England -
London -> Belgium
Holland S London -> Belgium
NS Convoys London -> Belgium
Skag S NS (support cut)
Den S NS

This is how elves roll.

Bitches, please.

The Most Wonderful time of the year

Since this is craig's busy season, we won't rush him. But he is trying my patience. Processing is on hold until I hear from Craig..

Current Information

Leading up to the Spring of 1905 here is the situation

The following countries have submitted moves:

Austria, Russia, Turkey, France, England, Germany

I need:

Italy

They are due at end of day tommorow. (tuesday) I will be helping with auditions so i may not process until wednesday.

Builds are in for the Fall....

Moves due Tuesday next week, lets try and squeeze in another before the break (if that's possible)

Builds and Adjustments:

Italy Builds army Rome

Russia Builds Fleet NC StPeters and Army Sevastapol

Austria Builds Army Budapest

France Builds Army Paris and Fleet Brest

England Destroys Army Yorkshire

Germany Destroys Army Ruhr

Turkey Destroys Fleet Armenia

Enjoy

Retreats are in

Here are the retreats.

England Retreats From Norway to Skaggerakt

Italy Retreats his army off the board (an interesting and intelligent tactical decision. Italy now has one build.)

I have builds/adjustments from the following nations...none of which will be made public until they are all submitted. You have until tommorow if you haven't done so already.

I have: Italy, Russia, Austria (posted on the board as I have no other choices) England and Germany.

I need: French Builds and Turkish combustions

Moves will occur over the weekend? due tuesday?

Austrian Interlopers

Little Tommy Two Step certainly does talk a good game. He sidles up to you, starts whispering serpentine fantasies in your ear, gains your trust, and then stabs you in the back...or the front, as the case may be.

It had to come someday...

Well folks the time is rapidly approaching, and it seems I may take my bow out before Larry is finished off. But only time will tell for sure. It's been fun, but I will still be available as consiglieri to any one who wishes to seek my counsel. Until then, lets hope for a continuation of the backstabbing bloodbath that has kept us so wonderfully diverted from reality.

Pictured below:

The Frisco Kid, telling me he will support me in Bulgaria, but in reality he is breaking my heart...

This is Turkish D'Light, signing off.

Retreats Fall 1904

Before we can submit builds, we need to have England and Italy post their retreats. Please email me by end of day tuesday so I can do that, and we can all submit builds accordingly.

Once I've posted the new information about the positions, we can submit secret build and destroy orders which are processed at the same time.

For future information:

England currently controls: Edinborough, London, Liverpool, Denmark, Holland

England must disband a unit

Russia currently controls: Norway, Sweden, Stpeters, Warsaw, Sevastapol, Moscow, Rumania, Ankara

Russia may build 2 new units

Turkey currently controls: Constantinople and Smyrna

Turkey must destroy 2 units

Austria currently controls: Vienna, Budapest, Trieste, Serbia, Bulgaria

Austria may build one unit

Italy controls: Venice, Rome, Naples, Tunia, Greece

Italy has no builds

France Controls: Paris, Brest, Marsialles, Spain, Portugal, Belgium

France may build 2 units

Germany controls: Berlin and Keil

Germany must destroy 1 unit

Builds do not need to be submitted until people know where the retreats are.

Results Fall 1904

England -

Edinborough -> York

London Holds

Norway Holds (dislodged must retreat)

Kiel -> Holland

NS supports Keil -> Holland

Denmark -> Kiel (bounce)

France-

Paris -> Belgium

EC supports Paris -> Belgium

Burgandy -> Munich

GOL holds

Spain -> Marsailles

Germany

Munich -> Ruhr

Helgolandbight -> Kiel

Berlin Supports Helgolandbight-> Kiel

Beliguim -> Holland (dislodged and retreated off the board)

Russia

Stpeters -> Norway

Sweden Supports Stptrs to Norway

Silesia Supports Burgandy -> Munich

Const -> Ankara

BlackSea Supports Const -> ANkara

Rumania Supports Serbia -> Bulgaria

Italy

Tyrolia -> Munich (bounce)

Venice Holds

Greece Holds

Tunis -> Western Med

Tyr -> GOL (bounce)

Turkey

Smyrna Supports Aegean -> Const

Aegean -> Const

Bulgaria supports Aegean ->Const (cut, dislodged, retreats off the board)

Ankara -> Black Sea (bounce) - note: a unit may not cut support in an attack against itself

Austria

Trieste -> Tyrolia

Vienna supports Treiste -> Tyrolia

Budapest -> trieste

Serbia -> Bulgaria

An interpretation of the Results

Istanbul....once Constantinople....now it's Istanbul, not Constantinople, why did Constantinople get the works? That's no body's business but the Russians

In the east, the stalemate continues but not for long. With French Fleets crawling up Craig's backside and Austrian Units continuing their assault from the front, Craig's Christmas may be getting very warm indeed. Owen is far too trusting, and while I don't know how he was clever enough to get a picture of my first period class, I will be looking into it.

In the West, Larry shows us once again why he is the only person from Greeley who will ever recieve a college recommendation from me. Bouncing the English and holding off uncoordinated attacks by the Russians, French and Brits, he maintains control of all four of his supply centers. Bill Gerrard's Armies meanwhile made their trip across the Atlantic for nothing and went back to Scotland to eat blood sausage. Fight on Larry.

-Archduke and happy Russian puppet government Tominand

Results - Spring 1904

There's so many bounces in the south it feels like a trampoline.

Austria

Vienna Supports Trieste -> Tyrolia

Trieste ->Tyrolia (Bounce)

Budapest ->Trieste (Bounce)

Serbia -> Albania (Bounce)

Italy

Tyrolia Supports Munich (Cut)

Venice Supports Tyrolia

Rome -> Tyr Sea

Ionian -> Tunis

Greece -> Albania (bounce)

Turkey

Smyrna -> Greece (Bounce)

Aegean convoys Smyrna to Greece

Bulgaria ->Serbia (bounce)

Ankara Holds

Russia

Armenia ->Constantinople

Black Sea convoys Armenia to constantinople

Rumania ->Bulgaria (bounce)

StPetersburg holds

Sweden Holds

Silesia -> Berlin (bounce)

France

Brest -> English Channel

Paris -> Picardy

Burgandy -> Munich (bounce)

Marsailles -> Gulf of Lyon

Portugal - > Spain

England

Edinborough -> Holland (bounce)

North Sea Convoys Edinborough -> Holland

Denmark -> Helgoland Bight (bounce)

Norway Supports North Sea

London Holds

Kiel Supports Edinborough -> Holland (cut)

Germany

Belgium -> Holland (bounce)

Helgoland Bight-> Kiel (bounce - cuts support)

Berlin supports Helgoland bight to Kiel (cut)

Munich Holds

Any Questions, Comments of Concerns, please let me know.

No reteats or builds

Moves for the Fall of 1904 are due next Thursday by 9pm.

Since there has been limited activity of late...

I will include a picture of Tom's students, blatantly not paying attention to him:


And with that I bid you happy hunting for the 1904 season.
A good vintage, it can be assured.

Current Information

Current Information: (As of November 22nd, 2:30am)

Moves are Due for the upcoming Spring of 1904 by Thursday at 9pm on November 29th (Next Week)

The Following countries have not yet submitted moves:

Italy, Germany, Austria, France, Russia, Turkey, England

Analysis: A WW I style deadlock is gripping the eastern front. Russian and Austrian Forces continue to grapple with the Turks and Italians with neither side making much headway. French Troops look to join the fray against the Italians. The English continue to make headway across the German coastline as the Russian, French, and English Triple Alliance attempts to complete it's goal of destroying Larry. To his credit, he has held you ALL at bay for the better part of 2 years. Despite having no allies and no help. I would contest that any other player put in his horrible position would have folded like a bad lawn chair by now. Fight on Larry, you may tip the balance of power one way or another, or, god help us, pull a Mullane and stay in the fight.

Listen to the advice in the picture, we all need to be more trusting. Let's take a chance and go for the gold.

Winter Adjustment Phase 1903 Completed

Builds so far

Germany - Destroys Army Picardy

Russia - Destroys Fleet Sevastapol

Austria - Builds Army Budapest

Italy - Builds Fleet Rome

Turkey - Builds Army Smryna

England - Builds Army Edinborough

France - Builds Fleet Marsailles

It is with deep apologies that I vow not to post these piecemeal again. The whole point of submitting builds in secret is so that those who wait till the end don't get to "react" to what others do. In my haste to post I jumped the gun. It won't happen again. In the future, no builds will be discussed by me until after all are submitted and all are posted simultaneously.

Submit Builds!

Pictured Left is the man who has been hunting Bill Gerrard for speeding for the majority of his adult life.

In the South - Coordinated Efforts by Turkey and Italy (shudder with disgust) have borne fruit for the elf in the form of a build and good position. While the three of us spar, Austrias Big Brother and source of it's puppet government being their invasion of Turkish soil. It looks to be a costly stalemate.

In the East Russian and English Units have siezed control of German ports. It doesn't look good for larry, and only a miracle could save him now.

In the West, France has finally pulled his act together and has taken control of the napping spainards. His next target? The Italian Menace? the Austrians will bake them as many crumpets as they can eat if French units manage to break through the Elf Front.

Builds Needed by Wednesday and then Moves will be due on the Thursday AFTER Thankgiving is over.

Austria Currently Controls: Vienna, Trieste, Budapest, Serbia and has 3 units

Austria Builds Army in Budapest

Italy controls: Venice, Rome, Naples, Tunis and Greece and has 4 units

Italy may build one unit

Turkey controls: Bulgaria, Constantinople, Ankara, Smyrna and has 3 units

Turkey may build one unit

Russia controls: Moscow, Rumania, Warsaw, Stpetersburg, Sweden and Sevastapol and has 7 units

Russia must DESTROY one unit

Germany controls: Berlin, Munich, Belgium, Holland and has 5 units

Germany must DESTROY one unit

France controls: Paris, Marsailles, Brest, Spain, Portugal and has 4 units

France may build one unit

England controls: London, Edinborough, Liverpool, Norway, Denmark, Kiel and has 5 units

England may build one unit

Results Fall 1903

Moves -

Italy -

Tyrolia Supports Venice (negated due to the unit moving)

Venice to Trieste (Bounce)

Adriatic to Ionian Sea

Albania to Greece

Austria -

Vienna Supports Trieste

Trieste Holds

Serbia Supports Trieste

Greece to Albania (Bounce, Dislodged, Retreats off board)

Turkey -

Aegean Supports Albania to Greece

Bulgaria Supports Albania to Greece (cut)

Ankara - Black Sea (bounce)

Russia -

St Petersburg Holds

Sweden Holds

Silesia to Berlin (bounce)

Rumania to Armenia

Black Sea Convoys Rumania to Armenia

Stevastapol Supports Rumania to Armenia

Ukraine to Rumania

Germany -

Belgium to English Channel (Bounce)

Holland to Helgoland Bight

Kiel to Berlin

Munich Supports Kiel to Berlin

Burgandy to Picardy

England -

Edinborough to North Sea

Norway Supports Edin to NS

Denmark supports Edin to NS

Baltic to Kiel

London Holds

France -

Portugal Holds

Brest to English Channel (Bounce)

Paris Supports Marsailles to Burgandy

Marsailles to Burgandy

Waiting on Moves

The following countries have SUBMITTED MOVES

Germany, Austria, Russia, Turkey

The following countries have NOT YET SUBMITTED

Italy, England, France

I would like to post the results tommorow so please email them to my

TMullane@superteacher.us address

Thanks, the management

Retreats for 1903 (spring)

France Retreats to Marsailles
Turkey Retreats to ANkara
Russia Retreats to Rumania

Results Spring 1903

Italy -

Apullia -> adriatic sea

Ionian ->Albania

Venice -> Trieste (bounce)

Tyrolia Supports Venice to Trieste

England

Denmark to Baltic Sea

North Sea to Denmark

Edinborough to North Sea (Bounce)

Norway supports Edinborough to North Sea

London Holds

Austria

Vienna Supports Trieste

Treiste Supports Serbia (cut)

Albania to Greece

Serbia Supports Albania to Greece

Germany

Kiel to Denmark (bounce)

Beligium to North Sea (bounce)

Holland Supports Belgium to North Sea

Picardy to Burgandy

Munich Supports Picardy to Burgandy

France

Spain to Portugal

Burgandy Holds (dislodged - must retreat)

Paris Holds

English Channel to Brest

Russia

Warsaw - Silesia

Moscow - Ukraine

Sevastapol Supports Rumania to Black Sea

Bulgaria Supports ALbania to Greece (cut -dislodged retreats to Rumania)

Sweden supports North Sea to Denmark

Stpetersburg holds

Turkey

Greece supports Ionian to Albania (cut - dislodged - exterminated)

Aegean supports Constantinople to Bulgaria

Black Sea supports Constantinople to Bulgaria (cut - dislodged, unit must decide where to retreat)

Constantinople to Bulgaria

Retreats options are marked in red, please let me know where you decide to go befoer sunday night so I can try and update the map.

Happy hunting, moves due Thursday next week

Builds for Winter 1902

I am about to go on, and realized I have not updated the map to reflect the builds. And bill is too busy posting pictures of himself with a litebright to let people know about them. Tony, I will be taking down my photo, as it is a little too embarassing. We both lost that bet, and no one wants to see your photos from the miss UNE pagent either

Russia Builds: Fleet Sevastapol, Army Moscow
Austria: Destroys Army budapest
England Builds: Fleet Edinborough

If everyone has submitted I will update late tonight when I get home.

Russian Builds

Since Tom is busy prancing about on stage in his "play", I thought I'd share my builds with everyone.

Fleet Stevastopol

Army Moscow

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark

Not only is it nutritious, it's fun to hunt too!

This past week just saw the end of another successful turkey hunt in the peaceful state of Maine. The wild turkey, while once on the endangered species list here, has returned to its plentiful numbers, allowing local rednecks and other gun enthusiast the right to hunt the beloved animal once again. I thought to myself, what better way to commemorate this grand occasion then by stabbing my neighbor, coincidentally named Turkey, in the back. Now all I have to do is collect my kill, and get it back to the misses to cook up in time for the holiday meal. I don't know what all of you are planning to eat this Thanksgiving, but I've got my heart set on a big bird named Owen.

Now that's what I call a sticky situation

Winter Adjustment Phase -

Germany has no builds

Italy has no builds

Turkey has not builds

France has no builds

England has 1 build

Russia has 2 builds

Austria must destroy one unit (Army Budapest)

Analysis - No headway has been made against the Germans, it appears a committed alliance will eventually crack him like an egg, but for the moment, Larry's skills are keeping the incompetent jackals that are England and France. The sleeping Giants that are England and France appear to be gaining steam. In the south, the futile assualts of the Italians are a tickle to the austrian front. However it appears a tentative alliance has been forged between the elf and the ruler of a secular Islamic state that currently houses the bulk of american airpower in Iraq. And the Russian has gained two supply centers both at the aid of his former ally and then again at his expense. I look for more Russian troops to march through Vienna and Constantinople soon.

Happy Hunting.

Builds are Due Tuesday

Moves are Due Friday this week.

PS this is the week of the play I am helping with, so please be patient with me posting any further after tonight, I may have to wait till Sunday.

Results Fall - 1902

Austria -

Gallicia - Vienna

Budapeset supports Trieste

Trieste Supports Gallicia - Vienna (cut)

Albania - Adriatic Sea (bounce)

Serbia Supports Rumania - Bulgaria

Italy -

Venice - Trieste (Bounce)

Tyrolia Supports Venice - Trieste

Apullia - Adriatic (bounce)

Ionian Supports Smyrna - Greece

(and craig negates his own existence with his futility)

Turkey -

Smyrna - Greece

Adriatic Convoys Smyrna to Greece

Black Sea Supports Rumania

Bulgaria Supports Smyrna - Greece (cut)

Russia -

Warsaw Holds

StP Holds

Rumania - Bulgaria

Sevastapol - Rumania

Sweden Supports Skag - Denmark

England -

London Holds

North Sea Holds

Norway Supports North Sea

Skag - Denmark

France -

Gascony - Spain

Marsailles - Burgandy

Paris - Picardy (bounce)

ENG holds

Germany -

Munich Holds

Kiel - Denmark (bounce)

Burgandy - Picardy

Belgium S Burgandy - Picardy

Holland - North Sea (bounce)

Waiting on the World to Change

Only Germany Remains needing to submit moves. My email is up and running again, so I should be recieving everything normally right now. Here is a completely unbiased picture of Larry. If I don't recieve moves in some form by Sunday night at 7pm I will process without him.

Speaking of Embarassing Craig...

Pictured Below:

Craig at a gigolo job-training seminar entitled: "Specialty Acts"

Email Sorted Out

Nice Jacket Bill

Well apologies for the delay, Larry and Craig need to resubmit moves, or in craig's case, submit them late again for the first time. I was so hoping that Craig would be caught mastrubating in peanut butter, or whatever the hell it is he does while not taking the 10 minutes necessary a week to sort this out. As his inaction is my gain, alas, Craig, your delay will result in Bill mercilessly torturing you through photoshop. It's good that the only picture of me available was one from high school. Owen's is pretty good too.

I need moves from Italy and Germany emailed to my TMullane@brewsterschools.org account, I have everyone elses and submitted my moves to Damian for reference.

Big talk from Bill Gerrard, ironic really when you bear so striking a resembalence to the american air forces next target, let's hope your drug running family can keep you hidden from the feds for long enough to let you finish this game.

Isn't it always my fault

unfortunatley something is actually wrong with my email. Which means my previous assessment of you clowns was wrong. Please resubmit all moves to my school address

TMullane@brewsterschools.org

Lets go jackasses

I check my mail at 7:48 to find that NOT one of you has yet submitted moves for this evening, I am going to close my eyes, grade some papers and hope against hope that they're in by 930, because if they're not I reserve the right to be the only one who moves. Booyah, happy halloween, you guys are hella stupid

-Archduke Lame Duc

CURRENT INFORMATION

The sharks smell blood in the water. (looks down) I appear to be bleeding profusely...into the water at my feet. Well no matter, things appear to be looking up for Austria. My simultaneous wars with Italy, Austria, Turkey and soon France, Germany and England, appear to be going well. (He puts a tin pot on his head and hides behind a sandbag barricade) If only Hitler's alpine retreat were available....but the Italians are in Tyrolia.

As of October 30th (Tuesday) this is the most current information available to me.

In Western News The above man has joined the war against England on Germany's side. Bill Gerrard....you're fired

Move are due Thursday

The following Countries have yet to submit moves for Spring 1902

Italy, Austria, England, Russia, Germany, France, Turkey

(As countries submit moves to my email address they will be slowly

removed from the above list)

Should all countries get their moves in early, I will make an attempt to process them early and post the results.

It has also occured to me that I need to make sure I am kept honest, so I will be emailing my moves to someone new each week (trusting you not to open them until they are processed) This way you will have a way of confirming that I didn't change them to adapt to someone else's - This weeks recipient will be Craig Rubens

FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!

We paid for blood!

appologies

Sir Tominand, I meant my previous post only as a joke, and rallying cry to rid you of the game, which has nothing whatsoever to do with your facilitating role (which has been performed with integrity and skill) and has more to do with the fact that we all feel threatened by Austria (or at least I do, what with your move to cut my support and shift into Albania, I think I made the right move not to trust you.) But I do trust you with steering the game, and I apologize if the jesting went a bit too far. Here's hoping you will continue in your exemplary role as facilitator long after you have shit the bed (here's hoping soon!)

As for the slightly embarrassing picture I posted of High School Tom... well I just thought that was funny.

Low Blow

I apologize for making the mistake, when you have 30 units moving and 4 windows up in your browser, it is easy to overlook something and make a mistake. Sorry for the error, it is now corrected in the official map listed in the results post. (the moves below listed it as having happened and always did)

Implying that I would deliberately misrepresent official information for my own purposes is a low blow. I may be a liar, but I'm not a cheat.

Manipulating the truth as always...

As you all will clearly notice, the magnificent Archduck Tominand has manipulated the truth once again. For those of you who only look at the map to find out the moves (instead of reading the poorly organized grocery list of moves) you will find that Mr. Mullane has failed in putting one of my very important moves (which is listed in the grocery list) on the map, making me seem still hostile towards Russia, and also potentially voiding any moves I may make with that unit next fall. This move of course is Armenia-> Smyrna, and I would like it corrected.

It is obvious to me at this time, that Tom may have been making similar moves of dishonesty throughout the game, without us noticing, and the only way to truly ensure fair and even commentary and movements is to eradicate the Tominand blight from the game. Just call me the Black hand, and this is a slow, gradual assassination.

Pictured below:

Tom, not seeing it coming

A Conversation with Owen, Craig and Tony

My analysis of the current state of affairs.

In the West, it appears that Germany will be following the fate of her sister state in the south, and will be making an early exit from the game. England, France and Russia have things well in hand...well england and france do.

In the east, a prison style orgy on austria has begun in earnest, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't deserve it. Don't think I'm going down without a fight. Negotiations with Austria are officially closed. I knew it was coming as soon as the two of you hadn't submitted moves by thursday. It was only a matter of time before you had a conversation and realized what a scumbag I was. I think it went something like this

Turkey: Duh, I'm owen

Russia: I'm tired of doing whatever Tom tells me, how about you?

Turkey: Duh, I'm owen

Russia: yeah I know that, but will you support me into Rumania?

Turkey: Duh, I'm Owen

Russia: ok, Tom doesn't suspect a thing...wait, Italy, what do you think

Italy: -silence-

Russia: Craig?

Italy: -silence-

Russia: Is he still playing?

Turkey: Duh, I'm Owen

Italy: what? fuck tom? sure I'm in.

Russia: ok are we all clear in the plan?

Turkey: (in an english accent) I agree that the current state of affairs is satisfactory, Tom will be forced to concede, wholeheartedly, that we are a contentious, litigious and respectable bunch of ragamuffins. As long as I manage to kill Craig by the end of the game I will be heartily satisfied, he is a wiley bird.

Russia: um...what?

Italy: I'm sorry, I missed all that last part

Turkey: Duh, I'm owen

Russia: whatever

Results Spring 1902

Retreats have already been made, since France and Austria only had one venue open to them.

Moves for Fall of 1902 should be submitted by Thursday next week.

Actual Moves for countries:

Austria:

Vienna ->Trieste

Trieste->Albania

Budapest->Serbia(bounce)

Serbia->Bulgaria (bounce)

Rumania S Serbia->Bulgaria (Support cut, unit dislodged)

France

Spain->Marsaillies

Paris->Picardy (Bounce)

Burgandy->Paris (Bounce and unit dislodged)

MAO->ENG

England

Norway Holds

North Sea->Skag

Lon->North Sea

Wales->London

Germany

Belgium->Picardy (Bounce)

Ruhr->Burgandy

Munich S Ruhr->Burgandy

Denmark->Kiel

Kiel->Holland

Russia

Moscow->Warsaw

Ukraine ->Rumania

Sevastapol S Ukraine-> Rumania

(in the future, please note that moves do not need to be written in bold to emphasize that you are stabbing me, I figured it out all on my own, this goes for you as well turkey)

StPeters Holds

Sweden S North Sea->Skag (English fleet's move)

Turkey

Ankara->Black Sea

Armenia-Smyrna

Bulgaria S Ukraine->Rumania (Support is cut)

Constantinople->Aegean Sea

Italy

Venice->Tyrolia

Apulia->Venice

Naples-Apulia

Tunis->Ionian Sea

Builds Winter 1901

All Builds are in, Italy Built a fleet in Naples, and Turkey Built a fleet in Constantinople

Craig Posts Moves First....embarassing for all of us.

No, you can't, I'm Mike Tyson

From this point further, the excellent, Iron Mike Tyson, will be the spokesperson/Supreme General for the great country of Russia. In an interview earlier today, Mr. Tyson was asked, "What do you think of Archduke Tom's move against the Russian Empire?" He replied, "Tom is a conqueror? No. I'm Alexander, he's no Alexander. I'm the best ever. There's never been anybody as ruthless. I'm Sonny Liston. I'm Jack Dempsey, there's no one like me - I'm from their cloth. There's no one that can match me. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!!!!" The reporter followed up with, "Do you think there's a chance that you'll lose to Tom?" Tyson quickly responded, "Perhaps if I chop off my arms."

Sorry Tony. I'm glad I'm not near your house so you can't do me in a driveby. Rumania is mine, and the sunny shores of turkey will never no the tender caress of a Russian Fleet or army. Didn't my invention of the croussaint tip you off to my true allegiance? alas, it is with regret that I declare open war with you. Perhaps someday we can meet under more felicitious circumstances

(inset - Austrian envoys to Russia, clearly trecherous in nature)

P.S. - Happy Birthday to Bill Gerrard! October 17th! This makes Bill officially 21.

Results Fall 1901

I apologize for the lack of names, I thought this map might be better. If anyone has any better ideas for how to post this please let me know.

Results:

Austria -

Budapest -> Rumania

Serbia S Budapest - > Rumania

Trieste - > Venice (Bounce)

Russia -

Sevastapol->Black Sea (Bounce)

Moscow->Sevastapol (Bounce)

Ukraine->Rumania (Bounce)

Finland->Sweden

Turkey

Ankara->Black Sea (Bounce)

Armenia->Sevastapol(Bounce)

Bulgaria S Budapest->Rumania

Italy

Venice S Apulia

Apulia S Venice

Ionian->Tunis

France (Here shown in yellow)

Paris->Burgandy

Brest->MAO

SPain Holds

Germany

Kiel->Denmark

Holland->Belgium

Munich->Ruhr

England

North Sea->Norway

London-> North Sea

Wales Holds

Winter Phase - 1901

Alright Bill, since it's your birthday and I know that your not answering my phone calls means you have nothing left to live for but this game, I will post tonight.



The Following Countries have Builds. You need to submit by email what you are building - army or navy and the supply center it is being built in, keep in mind only open supply centers will be available for builds.



Germany Controls: Denmark, Berlin, Munich, Kiel, Belgium

You have 2 builds to submit



England Controls: London, Liverpool, Edinborough, Norway

You have 1 build to submit



France Controls: Paris, Brest, Marsailles, Spain

You have 1 build to submit



Russia Controls: Moscow, St. Peters, Sweden, Warsaw, Sevastapol

You have 1 build to submit



Austria Controls: Trieste, Budapest, Vienna, Rumania, Serbia

You have 2 builds to submit



Italy controls: Venice, Rome, Naples, Tunis

You have one build to submit



Turkey Controls: Bulgaria, Constantinole, Ankara, Smyrna

You have 1 build to submit



Please submit all builds by Monday Night so I can update the board. Next move is on Thursday next week at 9pm.

Proving Everybody Right

Tom Mullane will one day make an excellent father in the great tradition of the Mullane patriarchy. Having neglected my diplomatic duties until the last minute, Tom left a message on my phone with a spot on "I'm-not-angry-but-I'm-disappointed" tone. He even ended the terse message with "Don't prove everybody right."

Alas, I may have done so. The sons of Italy languish in an extended vacation, lounging by the Mediterranean, sipping mojitos, and ogling the foreign women. Perhaps Tom's words should be heeded. Perhaps their country will need them. Perhaps you all shall destroy the small slice of paradise I've made as benevolent dictator on my peninsular home.

Ciao.

Tom Mullane is a Lazy Son of a Bitch

Contrary to popular belief, Tom Mullane did not invent laziness. As you can see in the drawing above, it has been around for centuries.